My step-dad, Kenneth Keller, passed quietly Friday morning. He was 88 years old. We’ve learned a few details about the final months of his life over the past few weeks. He had been complaining about shortness of breath for a few months. His primary care physician examined him in August and again in September. He didn’t order any diagnostic procedures (i.e. chest X-ray). On September 28th, he was gasping for air and his neighbor, Helen, called 911 after talking to Ken’s primary care physician. He was transported to Loma Linda Hospital in Murrieta.

Ken was born in 1931 but we don’t know anything about his biological parents – he was put up for adoption and was adopted by the Keller family. I think he was born in Connecticut, but the family moved to Iowa.

He joined the United States Marine Corps in 1950 at the age of 19. He was shipped out to Korea. He fought the Chinese Peoples Volunteer Army (PVA) at Chosin Reservoir in December of 1950. This was a pivotal battle in the Korean war and huge casualties were suffered by all involved. The marines were surrounded by an overwhelming force of Chinese PVA. The marines broke through and marched to the port of Hungnam, about 70 miles away for evacuation.

Ken was about five and a half feet tall and weighed all of 150 pounds at the time. But he carried and operated a Browning Machine Gun which had to be a heavy load to hump through the snow covered mountains around the reservoir.

Ken married and settled in San Diego, California. I don’t know anything about his first wife and children. After the divorce, they were completely estranged. Ken went to work for the City of San Diego as an electrician – a job he held for over twenty years.

In 1972, he married my mother. I grew to respect the man, especially for the way he always took care of my mother. As I came of age, he helped me purchase my first car (and second and third). They lived in a few places around San Diego before mom and Ken both retired. I think it was 1994 when they bought a house in Sun City – which is now a community of the city of Menifee in Riverside County. My mom passed away in 2012. Ken continued to live alone in their house for the remainder of his life.

At Loma Linda Hospital, he was treated for fluid in his lungs. Diagnostic x-rays revealed a tumor in his left lung. After a week, he was transported to Ramona Rehabilitation and Post Acute Care Center in Hemet. He was attended by skilled nursing staff 24 hours a day there. However, the place is somewhat crowded and the staff appears to be overworked.

Our goal was to move him into a boarding care home where he would have attendants 24/7 in a much quieter environment and more personal attention. After some research, Donna and I toured a couple of facilities. We decided that a new boarding care home in a recently developed residential area of Winchester was the best choice. New Hope Residential Elder Care is owned and operated by Jane Mikenas. She provides personal attention daily and has two attendants on duty at all times to care for up to six patients – a 3 to 1 ratio of patients to caregivers.

Unfortunately, our was plan to move Ken on October 15th was dashed when he was diagnosed with an infectious bacterial infection. We weren’t able to get him into the boarding care home until Wednesday, October 23rd. By then, his health had declined dramatically. Hospice care evaluated him and assigned a nurse. Jane made him her priority as she was certain he was in his final stages.

My phone rang at 6:03am Friday morning. At first I thought it must be an East Coast telemarketer as I slumbered. Then I realized there could be another reason for an early morning call. It was Jane. She told me Ken passed moments earlier. She was at his bedside and held his hand as he slipped away. She had come in early because one of the caregivers told her Ken was struggling. He had been on atavan and morphine and passed away in peace.

Last January, I had Ken’s trust reviewed and updated by an attorney. I was named successor trustee and now I have the fiduciary responsibility to settle his estate. I met with Ken and my brother, Eddie, at Ken’s house in January to go over his wishes. I made copies of all documents and distributed them to my brother and sister to avoid any misunderstandings. This is a big responsibility and I wanted to be transparent with what would happen under these circumstances. I’ll be busy in the weeks ahead. I’ll try to update with a post or two covering happier stuff Donna and I are sure to find. Ken’s last words to us were, “You two have fun!”